There are many resources out there for people who want to support their queer friends and family members.Īlso let them know whether you mind them sharing this news with others or not. You could end the conversation by asking for their support and directing them to a resource guide, perhaps online, if they need it. “I’ve figured out that I’m actually pansexual, which means I’m attracted to people of any gender.”.“Since you’re important to me, I want to let you know that I’m bisexual.“After thinking about it a lot, I’ve realized that I’m gay.You may find it helpful to start with something like: This could help you segue into the conversation.
If you want to talk to them in person but are struggling to broach the topic, perhaps start by watching an LGBTQIA+ movie or bringing up something about an openly queer celebrity.
If you’re not comfortable talking about it in person, you can tell them via text, phone, email, or handwritten message.
If you’d like, you could ask them to be there with you when you tell others. Sometimes, it’s best to start by telling someone who you’re sure will be accepting, such as an open-minded family member or friend. This sort of situation is called “mixed orientation” or “cross orientation” - and it’s totally OK.īear this in mind as you consider your sexual and romantic feelings. Sometimes we’re not.įor example, it’s possible to be romantically attracted to men but sexually attracted to men, women, and nonbinary people. Sometimes we’re romantically and sexually attracted to the same groups of people. When it comes to orientation, we usually refer to romantic attraction (who you have strong romantic feelings for and desire a romantic relationship with) and sexual attraction (who you want to engage in sexual activity with). There are a few different forms of attraction. Having a sex dream about someone of the opposite gender doesn’t necessarily make you straight. Having a sex dream about someone of the same gender as you doesn’t necessarily make you gay. However, none of those things - sex dreams, sexual thoughts, or even feelings of intense attraction - necessarily “prove” your orientation. Sometimes, we realize this because we have sex dreams, sexual thoughts, or feelings of intense attraction toward people of the same gender as us. Many of us grow up to assume that we’re straight only to find out, later, that we’re not. And if it does turn out that you are gay, remember that there is nothing wrong with being gay – it is just part of who you are.It all started with a sex dream - does this mean what I think it means? Clarity often comes with time, so give yourself a chance to fully discover your sexuality. There is no need to rush into a decision or tell anyone about your exploration or come out gay. These feelings may give you signs that you are gay.īut take your time. In all, it's best to experiment with your sexuality and consider what you feel like when with a woman or when with a man. Do you think how you feel about the same sex matches that definition? Dealing with Signs You Might Be Gay The American Psychological Association defines sexual orientation as an "enduring emotional, romantic, sexual, or affectional" attraction toward another person. Have I had sexual same-sex experiences in the past?.Have I considered having a sexual relationship with someone of the same sex?.Am I physically attracted to the same sex?.Do I feel strong emotional bonds to the same sex?.Have I ever been sexually attracted to the same sex?.When looking at the signs you are gay, you might want to ask yourself these questions: 1 So don't fall into the trap of thinking that your clothes, hair or attitude determines your sexuality. Just because you are a man who is effeminate or a woman who is boyish, that does not mean that you're necessarily gay. There is no one way that gay people act or look – gay people are just as diverse as straight people. There are also signs that you might be gay to consider. You might also want to consider the possibility that you are neither gay nor straight and are bisexual or just curious. When it comes down to it, there is no reliable " Am I Gay test", so the only way to know that you are gay ( definition of gay) is to look within yourself to determine your own thoughts and feelings towards others of the same sex. Particularly when young, some people may ask, "How do I know if I am gay?" if they have conflicting sexual feelings.